Is this you?
“I feel like a multiple meditation failure”
or
“I started full of enthusiasm and goodwill several times, but rarely made it past day 5″.
ARGH!!! I feel your frustration at wanting to do it but not being able to keep up the momentum. Let me help by sharing the behind-the-scenes secrets I used when I first started.
But before I dive into that, a question for you:
Do you know why you want to meditate?
Having this knowledge is a bit like setting yourself a clear goal. When you know why you’re doing your meditation it helps you stick with consistent and regular practice. Knowing I wanted better relationships with my hubby and my parents were one part of my secret stick-with-it formula.
Wanting Better Relationships
My relationship with my Mum and Dad had been a struggle for my whole adult life.
When I hit my Forties I felt it was time to change that.
I couldn’t put up with feeling anxious or frustrated every time I talked to them on the phone or visited. Seeing as Dad was getting older and frailer, if I didn’t change things now, then I’d have lost the opportunity and I didn’t want to regret it.
Similarly, with my hubby, our relationship of 20 years was not as happy and harmonious as either of us wanted. If we were going to stick together for another twenty, we needed to do something to change that.
Tracking meditation progress
Once I’d identified that I wanted ‘relationship help’ from my meditation I made a conscious and deliberate decision. I intentionally decided to be more mindful of how meditating was affecting my thought patterns, feelings and behaviour:
Were my phone calls and visits to my parents less stressful than before?
How was I getting on with my other half?
Mindful progress
I decided to do my mindfulness review at the beginning of each meditation session. I made sure I actually did this by giving myself a set of questions to work through:
How did my life look and feel like yesterday?
Was it as happy and harmonious as I wanted it to be?
If something got in the way, what was that thing?
Doing this meant my meditation sessions then became really productive time.
I could analyse my progress and note when it wasn’t going as well as I’d like (which was often in the beginning).
I could rid myself of irritations and frustrations because I hadn’t fixed the problem (yet).
I could work out why problems were still happening and come up with new ideas. Or refresh and strengthen the previous strategies I’d been using.
If you’ve got any questions about how I did any of the above, I’d love to hear from you. I’ll answer your emails as soon as I can. xx Annya
